So, I was poking around the blogosphere with some unexpected free time I had on Friday and found a brand new blog hop that intrigued me … “Finish the Sentence Fridays” hosted by Janine’s Confessions of a Mommyaholic and Can I Get Another Bottle of Whine. Basically they give a beginning of a sentence and other bloggers and readers finish the sentence in a post or the comments. Cool, huh?
This week’s sentence starter,
“I went to the grocery store the other day and …”
… I started to have a mild panic attack. I became really anxious, I felt very warm, I had butterflies in my stomach. Why? Was a child missing? Did I lose my wallet?
Nope. I was just worried that I wasn’t going to be able to find all the things I wanted to get for my son’s holiday first grade class party.
I was (am) one of the 3 room moms that are in charge of the parties this year and I had taken a lead role in organizing this one. I had tons of ideas and had been organizing the party since the beginning of December, but knew that getting the (essential) food items a head of time didn’t make sense. (I didn’t want the to go stale or bad). So, here I was a the grocery store hours before the party. Sweating it. Worried that I wasn’t going to be able to find the items I wanted … or more accurately put … the specific items that I had in my head that we NEEDED to make my envision of what it was to be come to fruition.
It was December 21st. My son was at school and my daughter was home with my husband who had the day off. I was out running some last minute holiday errands and my last stop was going to be the grocery store before heading over the the school for the party. I decided to go to a grocery store that I don’t usually go to because my regular store was out of the way from where I was that day.
When I got into the store I looked at my phone (for the time because I never wear a watch anymore) and I realized that I had A LOT less time than I thought I did. Which is when the panic started to set in. And then I started looking for the essential item of white powered donuts (to make a cute snowman snack) and I couldn’t find them. I circled around … searching and asking. I couldn’t find them … I found some similar items, but they were cinnamon sugared (and who wants to eat a dirty looking snowman!).
I had to stop. Literally stop myself in the store and tell myself to calm down. That it would all be fine. Took a deep breath. And laughed.
I ended up finding the exact donuts I was looking for. I found all the other items I needed too (although I bought way too much than we needed … but better to have too much than not enough for everyone, right?). I ended up being at the school earlier than I needed (which is perfect for my sense of time). It ended up being a great party.
So … why? Why get so worked up about getting the right donuts? No one else, including my son, would have even noticed if they weren’t there.
Why? Because this is what I live for. I love being a mom. I love trying my best at making moments special for them. I love being there and savoring every moment I have of their precious childhood. I love worrying about and doing things for them. Yes, it is for my children … but I’d be naive if I didn’t recognize it’s for me just as much as it for them. It is how *I* want to be.
I’m a mom geek. And I’m proud.